Four passionate amateur cooks from the West Midlands join Gordon in the kitchen. They prepare three simple recipes: artichoke, asparagus, and onion tart with fried quails’ eggs; breast of duck with spring greens and gooseberry sauce; and a quick four-minute chocolate mousse. Gordon also teaches twin sister midwives the secrets of the perfect Sunday Lunch chicken. Other highlights include Nick Knowles challenging Gordon in a recipe showdown, Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall aiding Trinny and Susannah against sunburn, Jessie Wallace joining for dinner, and Janet Street-Porter exploring the Shetland Islands with a stint at a fish and chip shop.
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Welcome to the FW on the menu tonight onion tart with fried C’s eggs breast of up with Goosey sauce and a 4-minute chocolate mousse all simple and delicious recipes that you can cook at home plus I declare war on an American Invader they’re overfed over sex and
They’re over here and my chat with Jesse Wallace doesn’t quite go to plan now you’re famous for having a glass of wine I’m famous for having a glass of wine yeah well sort of I’m famous for having a glass of wine my dad I love my mother and I love
My dad want have all that never had and the f hereward c my mother and I CCH my dad that I love my mother and I love my dad want to have all that never Had [Applause] gentlemen good evening nice to meet you Joe how are you Chris are you well very well thank you and Josh Gordon and Stuart very well thank you Gordon so birmingham’s finest we are apparently the outskirts of B are you being snobby now yeah yeah yeah you’re here because
You’re talented Cooks yeah tonight’s going to be completely different to how you’d run a [ __ ] dinner party at home yeah I can imagine let’s get started then yes yes yeah Co let’s go okay gentlemen on order yes first ticket of the night for me the first
Ticket is the most important if you get this one right the whole night moves forward start off like a bunch of [ __ ] donkeys it’s going to be a long night yes wakey wakey yes I order four covers table 10 four art tart four breasts of duck and four chocolate
Mousse tonight start as a simple onion tart on a puff pasty base served with soft and creamy quaal’s eggs so onion purey covers 90% of the base yes yeah are these asparagus been lightly blanched in boiling water yes lightly cooked yes yes sir AR chokes asparagus
Yeah this is not that difficult is it no Che three or four tomatoes make the tart look fruitful Chef the nice thing about this Tart Is you can do it any time of the year with different kind of vegetables from the season right don’t put them the
Oven yet okay first of all get eight quail’s eggs in a pan don’t get them too hot otherwise the eggs start blistering okay right once all your qu eggs are in there put your Tarts in the oven right Stewart yes chef get those [ __ ] chip out fingers working let’s go right guys
You should start getting some TS in the oven by now yes yes Che come on come on boys yours in SHO the crow egg is the easiest thing to do you’re here because you’re a good cook you can’t even fry a [ __ ] egg come
On my name’s Joe I feel at home in the kitchen the knife feels at home in my hand my dream is to have a chain of exclusive small boutique hotels around the world with fantastic restaurants in them my name’s Chris Gordon Ramsey is a hero for me a few of my friends think
It’s a bit of an unhealthy Obsession I think my name’s Josh I tend to be very quick thinking in a fast restaurant you need that um I wouldn’t say I’m the best cook I just wouldn’t say actually I would say I’m the best cook my name is Stuart cooking for me is
All about timing and precision myself and the other guys are 100% committed we’re in it to win it Gordon Ramsey be the [ __ ] cat really he can shout he’s like deia Smith and uh Simon cow’s lovech child isn’t it really we’re very good at cooking special for
Us it’s all about winning I’m not interest in incoming seconds service please how much vinegar you put on there just why did you do that look look I mean I’m not being funny but look I mean how much vinegar you put on there huh look just touch your finger on
That [ __ ] thing now what soaking yeah soaking wet h huh it’s [ __ ] wetter than you start again yes yep [ __ ] out right Joe are they ready yes yes yes where’s the chives thought was on the plate sorry Chef come on guys that’s enough just look just a
Dribble yeah the idea is a nice crispy bass yeah nothing soggy that’s it a dribble nothing more than that let’s go we don’t serve soggy pastry do we service please thank you okay one more table coming in come on guys please some make sure cominging
Here in one minute there’s no more Ts uh Chris yes Che come here a minute sure as well yeah cuz you two have like [ __ ] gone off the ball a little bit just touch that with you come on there and you come on hurry up touch
It St [ __ ] cold I mean fridge cold can we get them in the oven and get them warm please yes come on did they go in the oven yes they did sh you’re lying aren’t you yes I am Chef you are why’ you find it funny when you’re lying I
Forgot Chef sorry oh no hey hey hey hey yeah what well okay then what’s what’s what soft sorry Chef creamy [ __ ] yolks and I’ve got another omelet again Chef there’s there’s four there that are perfect hey guys go Hey listen come here a minute just stop what you’re doing hey
Two seconds all of you come here a minute come here come here come here how are you going to feel at the end of the night if I just bang this [ __ ] out you’re arguing with me with a [ __ ] a flat [ __ ] pile of [ __ ] I don’t want
To argue with you guys I just want to get it right to get it out every time I say something you’re all a [ __ ] bunch of chippy little [ __ ] that want to tell me that how good you are cuz right now I think you’re [ __ ] yes chef chef Serv
Go go please last table yes slay down yes [ __ ] hell there’s just one more week before my pigs triny and Susanna go to the slaughter house and as it’s one of the hottest days of the year I have to take extra care that they’re coping they’re
Not moving very fast in the heat no well don’t forget they suffer sometimes the Heat come here please Meg behind the ears there you go see she likes that hey pigs have no sweat glands so to keep cool they like to cake themselves in mud go mad
Look at them they really are enjoying that that’s hello mate all right pig man you I’ve called hly witing St to see if there’s any more I can do to keep the pigs comfortable in the heat now why is there skin gone all flaky like that Hugh
Well it could be a little bit of sunburn but I I don’t think it’s too bad I think it’s it doesn’t look sore it looks like it’s going to be a few more scorching hot days so I did bring them a little bit of this [ __ ] it out Factor 20am
They’re not always very sensible about sunbathing pigs they’re a bit like people the pig’s skin produces less natural oil than most animals making them particularly prone to sunburn behind the ears Gordon’s going to have to deal with a difficult very emotional day when they go to slaughter come on
Lady they’re beautiful he’s feeling really quite attached to them at at the moment he’s had a a great spring looking after them it’s going to be a shock for him the thing is Gordon actually you’ve you’ve probably far exceed needed the normal level of contact even from a you
Know a regular pig man looking after his pigs probably doesn’t get as emotionally involved as you have you got a little under a week now you’ve really got to start focusing on the fact that this is not family they’re not even family pets you’ve reared them for meat you’ve
Reared them for food feel guilty though cuz that’s what I’ve been feeling over the last two weeks I think you’re going to feel guilty I don’t think there’s any way around that I mean you could argue forever about the morality of whether we should or shouldn’t eat meat one thing’s
For sure if if we are going to eat meat we should look after our animals well and you’ve done that and and in the end it’s sort of something you you kind of have to deal with on your own but I think you’ll be right [ __ ] the arti choke the egg everything
It all went together really well I thought it was all quite tasty I actually really enjoyed it I found the pastry a little bit tough to get through um but everything else was absolutely lovely Gordon okay what’s the results 24 people are not paying for the for the
Why not two different reason one of them is the uh the Bas solid uhhuh uh another one is the uh to soggy as well soggy yeah with the vinegar you know too much vinegar so solid and Soggy yeah I going to understand it being soggy cuz they
[ __ ] sit too long okay but solid it could be if they overcook them but they flash them to the oven for 30 seconds how long will you put them in the oven for 30 30 seconds anyone put them in there longer than that no Chef no Chef
No or you forgot to put them in at one stage if it’s hard and they can’t cut through it that’s either it’s been in the oven too long or yeah they’re Stone Cold Che Chef so 24 customers don’t want to pay for their startup yeah they’re not
Paying at all that’s just under half the dying room yeah I know it’s bad like they like duck that’s hope they like Duck I think they’re [ __ ] Christ alight half the dining room that’s a [ __ ] joke next on the menu I get twin sister midwives to deliver the perfect suly
Lunch when the fire alarms go from the house when they start going then I know that dinner’s always done and in the recipe challenge Nick Nolls takes on an F-word classic I have cooked it before uh for a woman and I have to say it’s gone down very well do you get a
[Applause] Shake they’re over fed over sexed and they’re over here the American signal crayfish has taken over in the 1970s freshwater crayfish tals were all the rage but our puny native crayfish were considered too small so farmer started breeding the fatter and meteor American signal crayfish big mistake the Americans took over and 30
Years on they’ve invaded 85% of our British Rivers virtually wiping out our native crayfish and now they’re destroying our river banks we’ve got to fight back fight back by as many as we Can there are over 250 million American crayfish in our Rivers Mike Robinson owns a pub where they’re best seller on the menu he’s brought Jack and I to the river Pang in barire to show us how to catch them I reckon that fish is the
Best bait yeah cuz if you think about it what do they probably eat the most of is dead fish on the bottom of the river they’re scavengers slash them right that’s irresistible to a pray fish all we have to do is Chuck it in and tie it
To a tree I mean it’s like the same process of a Lobster Pot exactly it’s a perilous game you do need to get a license from the environment agency to do this but just like the crayfish they’re free so this is perfect it’s a natural feeding ground
For the crayfish they’re going to come out the bank and they’re going to smell that and they’ll come 100 yards up River to that bait go for it beautiful I could catch 20 kilos of crayfish in here in here in one night when the water temperature drops below 10° you can
Forget it really yeah they go they hibernate they just go to sleep so in the winter where do they go under the river banks and that’s when they cause all the damage cuz they burrow deep to get away from the cold and they just curl up and hang out oh Jack look is
There a fish no there’s a crayfish down there where look just there he is a huge crayfish him back quick Daddy just here you go here you go here you go oh look at that size of him I he’s like a lobster that’s a that that is a monster
That’s honestly that I mean that’s incredible just look at that there though in terms of meat I know how much claw meat’s in there it’s unbelievable you look after him you’re going to keep your an eye on it that’s your first crayfish okay let’s go you
Keep your eye on that one eh crayfish are night feeders so you leave the traps out overnight we’re collecting traps that might put down yesterday if you were a prawn trapper in the sea yeah you’d be delighted to get that that’s one night look at them what would a
Native you know cish look like I mean same color no they’re they’re sort of pale paler whiter in color that’s a that’s an adult native would be that size whereas these guys 5 to 6 in Long ow if people ate them more and more then it would help the environment and it
Would where can you go and get 20 kilos of free prawns yeah if you don’t want to catch your own you can order American freshwater crayfish from your fish Monga now it’s time to get these Critters home and into the pot guess who caught the biggest
Crayfish Jack AIG gums is it not pinch going a little rinse okay and let’s get cooking them shall we there’s a big one fresh crayfish it doesn’t get any better than this these are going to be turned into the most amazing crayfish salad boiling water and crayfish
In and just watch them change color now within seconds they cook within 2 and a half to 3 minutes max and look at the color of them straight out if you peel them when they’re warm they come away from the shell a lot easier bodies off from the
Towel look at that that is delicious slow roasty tomatoes green salad freshwat crap fish tails and vinegarette there you have a delicious crayfish salad that cost [ __ ] all 24 [ __ ] customers are refusing to pay for their starter I want 50 customers paying for their duck otherwise we’re
[ __ ] we’re not going to be [ __ ] let’s go pan on season the duck get ready yes good get on there yes chef let’s go guys yes chef right Chris yes chef Four duck away table three please yes chef Josh yes chef Four duck away please table 10 yes chef let’s
Go time for the course roast duck with spring greens and Goosey Sauce duck breast bit of a chef’s favorite because it’s absolutely full of flavor y me very rich and the texture is extraordinary score don’t go all the way through just the layer of fat cesan pepper lightly roast them in a dry Pan the smell is amazing season grind rub almost like you’re massaging
And this is one of the most amazing seasonings in Chinese cook cre and makes the duck very aromatic mop it up into a dry pan on a low heat slowly cook Gooseberry sauce sugar water lemon zest boil Goose spre you got that sweet that tanging us against the rich Sumptuous of
The duck is delicious just bring back up to the bowl and take off the heat set aside red wine season now it’s reduced down to a really nice syrup and that gives us nice shine to the sauce and starts to give it some body chicken stock reduce that’s the basic method of making
A sauce in all our kitchens goose spres in honey get your spoon put it into the sauce and watch a nice hot spoon how easy it drops off butter take off the heat and just shake look at that gloss very velvety beautiful Goosey sauce that’s ready to
Go now look What’s happen to the duck turn up the heat start coloring the duck and the nice thing about the sesan pepper now is starting to smell slightly sweeter and it’s becoming a lot more aromatic that side down into the oven hot oven 10 minutes now the smell is
Amazing three or four slices maximum onto the plate and glaze those gooseb are just nice and soft and plump give me give me give me dck with Goosey sauce done come on guys yeah it’s payback time yes one table each yes come on you P should go on
First and stew the trick with duck is to lose the fat and keep the flavor yes and the cesan pepper sort of gives it a little bit more oomph there yes yes okay right cookon this fat couple more minutes right potatoes soé potatoes oil in the pan potatoes in try and get them
Really nice and crispy now I’m going to put a teaspoon of garlic in there a little bit of shellant okay knob a but in there and watch what happens they start sating beautifully yes pass me the duck Chris I’ll show you how to dress the plate watch little bit of cabbage
Potatoes this size four yes okay watch the duck look come here fat side turn it round yes one 2 3 4 nice turn it back around as it goes on the Cabbage it fans out nicely sauce over the duck and when you sauce over the duck like that on top it just gives
It a little bit of extra heat yeah yes sure up Source the last two let’s go that’s how I want them okay move your ass let’s go Chris yes are they burning there turn it over quick [ __ ] hell Chris yeah it’s burnt yeah it is burnt start again Chris please Chris don’t
[ __ ] the duck start again let’s go Che come on guys Josh take what in the [ __ ] are be done there Josh take Josh oh come on oh come on Joe don’t leave your brother in the [ __ ] open up guys I need you to help me in little bed there [ __ ] cooked
The [ __ ] Josh come on speed up guys yeah not only just moping around the kitchen but no one’s got any [ __ ] oomph in them you’re walking around like you’re [ __ ] buying a new pair of trousers oh yeah just get I’m I here to work come on getu on I’m doing I’m
Going right now service please s over up put it up put it up please Shi put the [ __ ] plate up please sorry guys I’m [ __ ] trying so hard here but it’s a [ __ ] nightmare watch let’s go let’s go let’s go service please all like that yes yes sure let’s
Go go last one table 10 yes don’t make a [ __ ] mess yes everything’s on there perfect yeah don’t make a mess let’s go [ __ ] last table yes [ __ ] hell Charles yeah I would say so nice to see you but what the [ __ ] is that to see me what that it’s like
It’s like UFO what is it that’s a Jeff can’t what happens in your misp youth do you know eat Jaffer cakes I love Jaffer cakes but that I mean my God on my is it serious it’s a pin Jeff who made it well I made it Britain home of the giant carrot and
The unfeasibly large leak just what is it about old people and the growing of gigantic vegetables whatever it is the craze for creating Giant Food stuffs has been passed on to the young as well but they’re not interested in huge fruit and vegetables oh no they don’t even know
What vegetables are what they’re doing is making giant predominantly carbohydrate based snacks biscuits chocolate bars that sort of thing something known on the street as pimping I’m not making this up snack pimping is a real thing it’s it’s even got his own website at pimp that snack.com
It’s a genuine phenomenon The Pimp That Snack site has nearly 200 Mega Munchies for us to Feast our eyes on I mean get a load for example of this custard cream see how the cup of tea gives it the scale it’s it’s a Whopper every stage of the pimping process is photographed and
Documented this is fantastic the chap has really really pimped his Scotch egg having wheedled my way into the pimping Community I’ve been lucky enough to secure an introduction to a Mr soup dog hello soup hello now you pimped the the Fantastic fist of fudge didn’t you
Indeed it did yeah fair enough but why pimp anything at all a lot of it is the challenge it’s um you know can you deconstruct the snack and then rebuild it up from its uh from its kind of core ingredients and you know hopefully then improve upon it clearly then the first
Step for me is to take soup’s advice and deconstruct the traditional Jeffer cake sponge base humant D sodium d phosphate smashing orangey bit excuse me um where do you have the the dexr monohydrate Uh if anybody stops and asks personal consumption righty ho I need 240 G of butter that’s 1.5 kilos oh 50 of sugar six tablespoons of cornflour 18 eggs the base is the key if I can crack that I can surely crack the giant jaake voila now the problem is of course
That the domestic oven particularly mine is not big enough to cope with a giant Jeff cake a pimp snack I’m hoping you fit this in your oven okay see how it’s turned out it has Jaffer Cate written all over it to make the orange filling I used a
Couple of packets of tangerine jelly mixed with boiling orange juice and some additional gelatin okay the zesty jelly center in its wet state right time for the Smashing orangy bit easy another picture it just rolls off the edge you have to remember that I’m not just baking a cake I’m pimping a snack
I’ll send my pictures to the website where they’ll join the other 200 snacks pimped to date and be subject to peer review I named my pimped snack Jeffer Quake within 24 hours of my posting it it went straight to number one with over 300 voters giving it an average score of
9.24 out of 10 I love Jaffer cake but Christ almighty that is fantastic how about that that really looks like a Jaffer cake got one of your hairs in there J is that hair or that’s one of my girlfriend’s hairs a girlfriend’s hair yeah we did it in my
Kitchen at home I have to say you know I thought it was going to be delicious it doesn’t taste that good you know that tastes terrible it tastes [ __ ] plastic do me a favor [ __ ] off and take it Jack with you thank you very much I
Hope you have success in all you do thank you Charles go dear howling you well thank you you’re looking great thank you nice to see you ladies how are you um you enjoy your main course happy with fantastic would you pay for dinner yes I would definitely thank [ __ ] for that good to
See you than you you like your I you play for my dinner sh I heard you like your meat pink no no oh dare no in terms of you like sort of you know you like not too rare no not too rare but pinkish yeah which is great
So you’re not one of those girls that Squam and cook it well done for me you like it quite which is nice yeah now you’re famous for having the glass of wine I’m famous for having a glass of wine yeah well sort of you know I’m famous for having a glass of
Wine you’re a girl you’re a girl that knows how to enjoy herself acting not famous for a glass of wine G no no I said how you going glass of wine yeah which is nice I’m not famous for it I didn’t think at first the Gooseberry would work very well with the
Duck I thought it might be a bit too tart but it was actually just complimented the tenderness of the duck really well brought out the flavor of the duck and I really enjoyed that it was really nice taste to it really really nice crunch as you sort of tasted
The duck it was um it was very good guys come over please the results of the main course I know the starters went slightly per but I hope the [ __ ] you got some good news for the duck yes very good news good news yes how many
Have paying for the duck 47 47 yes 47 is [ __ ] brilliant well done with the three uh they mainly said that the the duck was over Cooks what overs yeah it was cooked for 4 minutes everything was pink I thought you done a [ __ ] great
Job to get that back up there I think you can understand why I was [ __ ] pissy to make sure that what left this kitchen was absolutely spot on right down to a potato yes well done now let’s make sure that 50 customers pay for their [ __ ] desserts yes let’s go well
Done next on the menu Ladies Man Nick nolles takes on my classic Beef Wellington in the recipe challenge I always thought you were the most amazing handyman yeah but not with building and the men in white coats come for Janet Street Porter don’t worry I don’t touch you I
Just listen I’m not going to do you for sexual harassment while I’ve got a plate of C in [Applause] my and what you been doing with those [ __ ] things huh like a sack of potatoes that’s just how they are huh welcome back now we all know that Nick
NS is no good with a paint brush and a hammer but will he be any better with a [ __ ] frying pan no let’s go what are you doing going to do uh a filler steak wrapped in porini mushrooms and herbs uh wrapped again in uh palah ham right so
You’re wrapping it twice mushrooms and palah ham herbs mushrooms palah ham it’s exactly the same as mine except I’m going to go a little bit further and wrap it in pastry yes listen I’m making this up as I go along I haven’t been taught by anybody I’ve had to teach
Myself right haven’t you got any work to do well we started are we for the last 5 minutes all you given me is [ __ ] excuses is this going to work listen I don’t need to make excuses because this is quality stuff mate the whole point is to make something that
Looks good tastes good that’s fairly easy because obviously I’m not a but fairly easy to do and has the desired effect when you serve it up to a young lady I have cooked it before uh for a woman and I have to say it’s gone down very well did you get a
Shake listen wait um it’s it’s terribly bad form to talk about women behind you know after you’ve actually been yes that’s that’s a no then so it’s very fragrant this dish then it’s very lovely and what it should do is when you open up the parcel there should be a little
Line of greenness sort of with the with the herbs all the way around the inside that should make it look good so I’ve got to do something very similar so it’s very easy for me because I’m going to just do a fillet of beef wellington again wrapped in mushrooms but the
Mushrooms are chopped so we call that a dukel chopped very very finely in the blender and then onto the stove to get the water out of them we’re going to wrap them around the beef then wrap that with paham and then finally wrap it in
Puff pastry so hot pan and put your beef in and seal it once the beef has been sealed we take it out the pan and then just rub it with some really nice English mustard as it cools down it goes through the center of the beef and gives it a really nice flavor
Right Nicholas how are we doing I’ve just wrapped the the steak and dipped it in the herbs and then put some B mushrooms either side wrapped up the Palmer around it because I don’t know how to wrap a steak so what I did was I decided that I would just wrap it in
Foil yes and then about halfway through the cooking process I take the thing out of the oven unwrap it and it should hold itself together Nick that looks like a jacked potato about to go on the [ __ ] barbecue listen I don’t care what it looks like at the moment it’s what it
Looks like when it comes out on the plate that’s important but that’s me done there that’s that’s me that’s me ready to go into the oven and all I got to do now is make the little sauce that goes with it you don’t just get the
Thing you get a sauce with me there’s a sauce as well oh yeah I thought why you going to put that in there you could [ __ ] off for a [Applause] shave by the way what I’m doing is using a ladle to take some of the mushrooms
And uh and the juice out because it gets this PO you get a lot of grit in with porini yeah it depends where they’re from yes so the best thing to do is to do it from the top like that with a lader then you don’t get the grit in it
Cook that up and uh with a little bit of lemon not too much though that would do uh let get some I like lots of pepper in with my stuff so so it’s really important to cook the mushrooms so they go really nice and dry got a nice strong
Flavor in there and it stops the pastry from going really soggy when Nick’s got that nice dark green line of herbs we’ll have a nice dark line of mushrooms around the fillet of beef little bit of garlic it looks like you’ve tarmacked some tahan tarmacked do look my my
Plaster could finish that off nicely for you you’re sounding like Nick the Builder now people that I know about DIY cuz I present a DIY program you do know about DIY though well not really I always thought you were the most amazing handyman no yeah but not with
Building you know and people say things like I get an enormous amount of satisfaction out of like working for 14 weeks on doing a skirt why get a hobby or a girlfriend don’t do DIY seriously serious and pay a builder um so I’m wrapping mine now Nick’s wrapped is in
Tim for I’m wrapping mine in tfilm and the idea is to get a really nice even shave look hang on what happens isn’t it going to melt when you cook it we take the clam off your [ __ ] banana so we wrap it nice and tight like that the
Most important thing is now that it’s nice and even so if it’s wrapped evenly it Cooks evenly you cook okay yes to pull women right that’s not only to the main objective on a date oh God that’s disgusting hey and you’re still single the difficulty is like if I if
You work as much as I do and you’re away as much as I do who put up with that really seriously who’s going to that’s horrible what am I going to do with that what have you put in there the porini mushrooms the juice from the porini
Mushrooms a little tiny bit of lemon juice it was a glass of red wine are you normally pissed when you make this dish listen it’s worked before that I’ll tell you what that needs is the meat juices you’ve ruined it because I’ve had to wait for you to cook my steak
Otherwise by now I’d have the steak juices to put in it to make it okay what am I going to do with this to make this to bring this track around again so pastry on and then egg wash it and the egg wash obviously helps to stick the
Pastry together so it’s a very similar recipe to what Nick’s doing except mine’s just finished whereby it’s wrapped in puff pastry and then rolled well I’m ready for the oven now are you yeah I’m ready to go yes so I’m just going to quickly lightly season it in
She goes so they’re both of the other 20 minutes each I take mine out to rest you take yours out and then I win good luck you reckon let’s go nice Sunday lunch is the most important me of the week and even and two identically incompetent Cooks can do
It Sunday lunch is a big deal for me I dread it because my kids expect their Sunday lunch it’s difficult cuz I wear night shifts when I come home I’m tired and all I want to do is just get the dinner done I dread it because everyone
Is going to moan at me as soon as I sit down there’s going to be something wrong mommy’s food is very bad I don’t like it I burn everything I cook absolutely everything Sunday lunch it’s pretty non-existent in this house there’s no preparation it’s all thrown
Together right I’m just going to pick up the nurses that have just finished their night shift take them home show them two or three things and hopefully they’ll keep their uniform on oh my God ladies now who’s who and no one at a time cool [ __ ] seat belts on please
Ladies you know I’ve never been to the delivery yet I can’t believe that I’m only been honest with you cuz four children and they yeah I know but if I was a lady and I had a vagina nothing would be coming out of it the size of a [ __ ] 8
Baby you’ve got four children between you yes yeah who gives them a good dinner they have the school dinner they eat at school anyway I know but they have get decent meal to have sandwich when they get home so the kids know they get better food at school then they do
At home yeah that’s right oh my God what’s in here what is that honey glaz’s roasted par Snips they are [ __ ] disgusting oh [ __ ] me that’s roast potatoes I Jesus Christ [ __ ] frozen roast potatoes Frozen parsnips and now there’s not even any markings on the [ __ ]
Oven how do you know if what’s hot and what’s C know we just turn it up full back actually I do know when it’s done when the fire alarms go in the house when they start going then I know that dinner’s oh it’s done Christ you look
[ __ ] great in your uniform but I don’t think we can start cooking in those yeah yeah uh go and get changed don’t come downstairs with the same clothes please right ladies and all going to do is keep it simple so we’re going to do something that’s all in one pot
Something that’s not stressful straightforward so it’s a chicken fra a little bit of flour on the plate okay now I want you to put the chicken on there please now the idea of coating it in flour he it gives it a really nice color on the chicken and B it helps to
Thicken the stock whilst it’s cooking good into the pan careful was your fingers good and then in there okay we’re going to do the vegetables now um what I’m going to put in there is carrots onions and celery okay okay so we’re going to try and keep it really
Nice and sort of chunky so they don’t cook too quickly now vegetables in just put them in there a little bit of rock salt in there please what do you think we’re going to do now what are we going to do yeah on a plate yeah know you’re going to [ __ ]
Poison someone the chicken’s raw what a [ __ ] nightmare white wine in then add stock and simle for 30 minutes the flavor is 10 times better yeah than that [ __ ] in your fridge serious it seems quite straightforward doesn’t it it is yeah yeah show hello it smells good for a
Change now who like some chicken some carrots what you’ve got to help me with is to make sure that mom cooks all the time say Mom I know you’re busy I know you work nicest but we can still have that delicious chicken dish again yes delivering two Cooks chining thank
You this has to be the easiest chocolate mousse to make and it tastes [ __ ] delicious chocolate petal into a bowl again bmarine melts very very quickly bring that to the boil now boil the cream what that does straight away is sort of almost thickens the chocolate mousse before we actually
Combine the cream and chocolate now look chocolate’s virtually melted already in that short period of time cream on yes all the cream in there whisk whisk whisk and then the rest of it straight away quickly now you whisk that over ice okay whing if we whisk it over rice it sets
Quicker Joe yeah okay the idea this of course it’s 4 minutes right amoretto into the chocolate okay to perfume the chocolate egg whites where are they touch of sugar wh that up all the egg white in still over the bowl of ice yeah then we’re now amirti biscuits in
There fold them in look right get glasses on the hot plate please quickly little bit of biscuit we don’t need to set it in the fridge okay let’s go the FW Cy cruise missile Janice reporter insists she w’t put any old thing in her gar time to find out what
She’s been putting in this week well I’m making one of my favorite dishes baked cod but with Cod stocks at an alltime low we’ve just got to find an alternative I’m traveling to the shetlands to the world’s first organic Cod Farm well I really care about what I eat and I’m not
Really prepared to eat farmed fish call me bonkers but I think if a fish has had a decent life you can taste it and I know that if I catch a macel on a line it tastes [ __ ] great tastes brilliant and it’s not just about the
Taste I can’t help being a little bit skeptical about any type of fish farm I do feel like signing off no lemons Mr [Laughter] Blobby time to make 50,000 Cod I know the fish farmed here are fed to sustainable organic diet but what I really want to know is whether so they are kept in good conditions so what’s the size of this pen the volume inside is the size of three olympic size swimming pools maximum that we would
Have in here would be 50,000 fish fish T sh together they like being close together the fish are graded in size to stop them eating each other and the Nets are doubled up to stop escapes so far so good but what about the taste how would you normally cook your
Card if it’s really really fresh I would Grill it Grill it yeah just that I’m trying my fee way to eat L butter and you obviously don’t care no not yet all it plays good the downside is that this farmed Cod costs a third more than the wild stuff and I’m not sure
That people will pay the extra so I’m taking it back down to London to put it to the test down at my local chippy I’ve got you a present what’s that it’s special card yeah let just shck it all in I don’t start criticizing me before bloody started I don’t touch you listen
I’m not going to do you for sexual harassment while I’ve got a plate of C man I’ve done one bit right can I put it in yeah put it in be careful go close to the P close letting go if you bought the regular kind of cod
In here it’ be 390 but this Farm card is 520 would you pay that bigger difference possibly 520 for a size like that seems a little expensive to be fair it’s more slightly drier maybe than normal P well I cooked it oh it’s nice and fresh yeah tastes like
Cod uh the batter is um just right yeah I’ll give it the thumbs up definitely next time I go to a supermarket I will be buying farmed Cod because if we don’t make that choice there will be no more Cod left in the sea but perhaps the
Answer is for the Great British public to stop being so bloody boring and eat different kinds of fish anyway out golden yes right one is Farm Cod yes and one is wild Cod would you like to taste yeah all the way from Shetland right yeah right that one there first now
And this one little bit more flaky slightly sweeter though I think that one for me is the Farms is that right though yes you’re completely right but slightly more people like the farm than like the wild but it was pretty even but when I tell them it cost £350 extra for
Half a kilo of that but why would Farm be a lot more expensive you mean wild be more expensive than Farm why well it’s because farmed is in its early days because wild is forget wild but you won’t be getting wild cod in a few years
Time because you won’t be allowed to fix it anyway so that is the future and hopes that the price comes down and what about this lot are they agreeing to pay extra they are saying they would pay more because they feel more comfortable eating a fish that’s sustainable that
Comes sustainable so I can’t [ __ ] believe that cuz half of them I’m paying for my [ __ ] starter and that was a delicious Tas that’s I talk to you about your St no go on don’t puff pastries in your ass already Yes get Puff you not
Reached my ass have you had a nip and tuck on that cuz it’s so [ __ ] no part of me has been nipped and Tuck and the first time I met you you totally got on my tits by saying I was the same age as your [ __ ] mother 59 thank you you
Want to tell all the what people J I can see look oh for [ __ ] sake can you [ __ ] off and let me come please yes dear oh dear next on the menu is the results of the recipe challenge so far it’s three wins to me and three wins to the
Challengers will Nick NS make it 4-3 is this man going to stay single for the rest of his life or has he got a chance of pulling a bird that actually enjoys his [Applause] food welcome back now it’s judgment time from Nick Nolls and I think his dish
Needs a little bit of kitchen SOS let’s see what our blind tasters have got to say don’t look stop laughing at my dish look I’ve got I want plent plenty of stuff for them to look Don’t Laugh at My Dish Hey listen okay where’s my Frenchman JB please yes at last time Hey
Listen last was a lost after as well I have lost a lot of [ __ ] challenges so I still [ __ ] myself but however this one I’m not okay don’t drop that plate in case you make it look better fck here you go Wellington so there’s the green dish okay very T past so
Crisy seasoning is superb and you can taste the mushroom as well mushro the DU I want another bit of meat I want a bit of the past right okay looks a bit thrown on the plate doesn’t it certainly doesn’t have the presentation meat overcooked as nowhere
Near as CH or anyone you can’t actually taste meat there’s Lo so many other flavors but I like the th flavor stuff inside it I think the time overpowers everything else nervous nervous for you I don’t know how you’re going to live it down well I know but I
Mean Pro the flavor yes yes um is this man going to stay single for the rest of his life or has he got a chance of pulling a bird that actually enjoys his food I’m going to tell you so um actually it might be hard but the the overall winner for today
Is yes yes get in there was it um was it a close score or was it no actually five out of five for you five out of five yeah get in there taking a Mickey five out of five yeah but yours was a p [ __ ]
So five out of five I can live with that Well Done big boy yeah then do me a favor yeah stop cooking and [ __ ] up out the kit thank you take care that sucks glass is out yes Piping Bag there ready guys here we go come behind shirt with a four yes yes
Come cheers mate come on come on guys don’t yeah biscuits biscuits biscuits biscuits yeah and look chocolate Okay glasses on the plates 11 11 yes come C okay good T 11 please ladies go thank you two seconds I thought it was absolutely delicious on the on the First
On the first Spoonful it was just it was very light and fluffy but there was also some crunchiness it was like a very sexy mtia I think it finished the meal off perfectly it wasn’t cold so it’s a little bit Angel delighted a little bit
It was kind of soft and warm and no it’s a bit nothing so I wasn’t a great fan of it really I loved it I could have carried on eating that until tomorrow morning nonstop and probably just had 20 minutes to go lie down and then Carri it on again it was Bloody
Brilliant John Baptist hi G yeah okay good results for the dessert yes so I know we’re slightly slow however yeah we were missing that little final drive that little bit of oomph right for the end 12 people are not paying for the chocolate M really yeah 12 12 yeah why
So many too simple too one just simp just simple desserts so a sophisticated really smart summer tart then a really nice rich duck nice light chocolate moves and they said that was too simple yeah clearly clearly too simple just the moves with you know yeah well let me
Tell you something I think they’re slightly [ __ ] simple that moose was perfect yeah yes let’s just sum up the night yeah the chart 24 customers refused to pay for the tart but then you pulled it back miraculously in a way that only three customers didn’t pay for the [ __ ]
Main cour which was brilliant news and then the big kick in the bollocks I think was the 12 that didn’t pay for the [ __ ] delicious simple chocolate MSE absolutely so that means 111 plates that we serve tonight were paid for and 39 refused to pay that’s not good you know it’s not
[ __ ] diabolical but it’s along the [ __ ] mediocre level yeah serious yeah and I’m not here for [ __ ] mediocre now clear down yes and let’s get [ __ ] home yes y yeah back to our day jobs yes little polish on the stove please yes yes chef yes thank
You next week John Thompson takes me on in the recipe Challenge and gets me to try his favorite Tipple don’t you think there’s a heat of licorice there afterwards not that bad can’t handle it can’t handle it I’m cooking my favorite dessert recipe an easy and delicious hot chocolate
Fondant and it’s time to say goodbye to my pigs I’m not very happy to see you girls go yes [Applause] la