Dawn French joins Gordon for dinner, revealing secrets about husband Lenny Henry, sharing a kiss with Gordon, and launching “Find Me A Fanny,” his search for a new female TV cook. Natasha Kaplinsky challenges Gordon in the F Word kitchen. Dawn is among fifty diners sampling dishes prepared by this week’s brigade, The Eton Boys, known for their passion for amateur cooking. Gordon challenges them with crab spring rolls, loin of venison, and profiteroles. In a twist, the best-performing brigade will return to cook at Gordon’s restaurant at Claridges, raising the stakes for the series.
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Welcome to the F-word here we go again I’ve got a brand new restaurant my kitchen my [ __ ] rules but all the dishes on the menu are still things that everyone could cook at home this is a simple dish even [ __ ] Angy Harriet couldn’t [ __ ] this one up yes eight new
Brigade from amateur Cooks will battle it out and so far you’re [ __ ] useless Harry your Pan’s on fire this time it’s personal the highest scoring Brigade okay across the whole series they’re coming to run my restaurant marriages yes I travel the globe in search of New World Delicacies feel like a big [ __ ]
Comom I’ve got some wild new diners this is Bulls penis Bulls penis would you be interested in my funny you and this year I’m taking Lambs to the slaughter it’s dinner time my mother and dad that I love my mother and I love my dad what have all
Never had and the F was here the F catch my mother and I CCH my dad then I love my mother and I love my dad want to have all [Applause] never [Applause] right fin the main course guys that’s there better get on with the starter gentlemen good evening
That’s me Tom good to see nice to see it Max Max Tristan Harry you four are a bunch of old lonians and all of you think youve got what it takes to work in my kitchen God help me okay Tom what’s on the menu tonight tonight we’re going
To do a crab spring roll with some chili dipping sauce uh um and then after that we’re going to do venon pan fried with some um SL you laughing har uh nothing yeah we’re not just cooking one table here we’re cooking 14 okay don’t let me down and more importantly don’t let
Yourselves down okay guys on order five c table 11 five crab spring roll five venison five profit all yes sir yes no [ __ ] forgive me I was not listening to the first [ __ ] off Max and wake up okay Max come here a minute come here if you
Don’t want to listen you walk over here and you check what’s on there okay clear good five crab Max and Tom come over I put this one together quickly what’s in there Harry let me through it again quick uh we got crab obviously we got sweet corn we got coriander we got
Spring onions we got the lime salt pepper obviously I’m only here thank you don’t worry I’m only here okay yes sir a tablespoon of grain mustard right let’s roll one together shall we a little bit of seasoning on there yes and then make a nice sort of almost like a sausage
Shape yeah just 1/3 in up over nice and tight and and just pull back press down your ends there Tom yes sir you you look like you used to roll these kind of things except we’re going to fry this one not smoke this one yes okay yes yes
Little bit of egg white and roll nice right come on guys let’s go eight first table okay let’s dress the salad shall we I need to do another one that didn’t work no that’s fine let’s no it didn’t look it’s ripped holy [ __ ] what we’ve
Just done come on you look watch me your hands are shaking like mad watch that’s the customer there facing you okay come on let’s go yeah right would you two pay for them yes or no come on go please table five go quick right that’s the first table out there yes far too
[ __ ] slow yes now that we know what we’re doing can we work as a bit of a team yes sir so far you’re [ __ ] let’s go yes sir unbelievable this has to be the hardest day work these guys ever seen in their entire [ __ ] [Applause] life I work for an asset management company I’m in financial services that’s why you’re here get the boobs out I have a bit of an income from a share portfolio that my dad created for me and I love eating out I love going out for dinner manag an oriental
Hotel ni Bridge it’s been a good night out when I spent less than100 we all went to school when we were 12 years old uh to a school called e college and since then we’ve known each other ever since I love cooking because um the artistic side of it
Getting your hands really messy quite like to have like a starter of cheeses with like a fish one do for main course I love fish it’s expensive I love adding my own J we going to sell 150 plates to it’s as simple as that we know we’re going to
Win on order four C table one four CRA roll four Ben and four profit roll it’s really important that you don’t [ __ ] around if I find you joking and pissing around I’d rather you just [ __ ] off home okay cuz all all I’ve seen so far is this jumped up a little six
Wants to play with his dick concentrate what you’re doing get it right we’ll have the [ __ ] fun after it so laughing joking in front of them you’re going to look stupid okay come on guys please come on come on come on come on this is this is beyond [ __ ] slow
Before you start rolling it taste it cuz what you’re tasting is what the customer’s tasting yes we can’t work this slow guys if you’re this slow at claru yes we’re going to be [ __ ] you know that huh there’s nine tables left to send it’s embarrassing come on yes sir just move your ass
Sh hello my darling hello how are you good to see very good welcome welcome welcome there thank you for that yes now you have to be my ideal guest perfectly oh why but you just love your food and you’re passionate yeah I am now who
Cooks at home we both do Lenny is in charge of meat right and I’m in charge of virtually everything else really meaning um meaning vegetables and sauces and things like that he’s cooking a um the most amazing Sunday lunch he’s got a leg of lamp and I am busy flitting about
Doing all the other stuff and saying when is the meat going to be ready and he lies about when it’s going to be ready he lies my B he says a yes it’s coming it’s coming it’s coming I was virally a bag of Boos by the time I got
My first no s um you had that um amazing setup on comic relief where you exploited the sort of most handsome men across the planet yeah in terms of um snugging them yes yes George Clooney Brad Pit Johnny dip Grant uh I frankly draw men to my lips like a magnet and
Who’s who’s next on The Hit List um well it’s not you Gordon um I generally look intelligent funny handsome people but you’ve got something on your lip now oh yeah it was actually my lips oh no that that wasn’t what we called no that was a nice one what we
Called tast your lips are soft and really good to see you know that thank you and you are an amazing kisser good to see you see you later yes who want that the flavors in the sauce and in the springle themselves uh out on anything I’ve had uh to do with crab before
Couldn’t taste the crab meat now in amongst the seasoning of the mustard and unfortunately once I put it in a dipping sauce it just was pure salt I’ve never had Cornish crab and um so it was really nice to try something different right okay results being starters yes out of 50 guests
Yes only 25 of them are paying yeah why sir um too slow too slow clearly far too slow yeah uh too much mustard as one did you taste it did you mixed it uh probably not every time no every time you make a new mix you taste it not good
Not good at all n but why don’t you try and pull it back for the main course yeah and get 50 out of 50 customers paying for the venison let’s go guys yeah next on the menu I get called out to a fast food emergency SI it’s like you just changed
A [ __ ] baby’s [ __ ] dwn French helps me in my search for the next Fanny crck would you be interested in my fanny you could and I head to Norwegian lap land to catch giant killer crabs my balls feel like two big [ __ ] ice cubes welcome back to the fword now time for
The main course Loa venison with sweet and sour peppers and broccoli R Loa venison one of my favorite Meats slightly gy absolutely delicious it’s packed with protein low cholesterol and so it’s like the Rolls-Royce cut it’s phenomenal I’m going to cut it into four marinade olive oil salt
Pepper time is a very sort of dainty soft sweet herb and it goes brilliantly with the rich gaminess of the venison juniper berries the flavor is almost like a sort of Rich Bittersweet slightly peppery flavor garlic get the back of your knife on get the loin place it on top olive oil [Applause]
Season leave that to marinade and that’s ready for the pan Cooking the venison you got to be a lot more delicate than you were if you’re cooking a fillet of beef because it’s very lean hardly any fat on there hot pan olive oil keep on rolling it around it should become nice and springy and slightly bouncy and that indicates that it’s
Slightly pink but a little bit firm in the center butter base Venison and then just take it out of the pan and just spoon it over there leave that to sit now for the sauce we’re going to do a really nice sweet and sound pepper red and yellow pepper just stand the pepper
Up on its base and just cut round like we’re segmenting an orange and look you got the seeds there fit for the bin olive oil in Peppers into the pan little bit of salt and by having the skin on the peppers it doesn’t allow the peppers to become too soft and
Overcooked it keeps them really nice and robust time this is where it gets really exciting white wine vinegar smells amazing but it starts to glaze the peppers I cut the tablespoons of water in there you got this really nice sweetened sour peppery vinegar at the bottom Pepper’s out carve nice thick
Slices and look the juice is coming out of the peppers a little bit of salt just glaz the venon with some extra virgin olive oil and there look benison with sweet and sour Peppers done okay listen I’m going to ask you for the last time to stop laughing and just take
This next [ __ ] half hour really seriously let’s go let’s go right there we go 30 seconds in Harry’s pissing his pants okay five table 7 five venison Harry yes sir let’s go let’s go right in got to get hot yeah nice and hot I asked for five venison in
You got four in there sorry sir sorry oh dear oh dear get some butter in there please no in there you’ve remembered nothing okay had a lot of information oh [ __ ] off all those [ __ ] school fees you can’t [ __ ] absorb jack [ __ ] the excuses you guys have come out with they’re [ __ ]
Hilarious come on let’s go Harry your Pan’s on fire stop what you’re doing put the pan down turn the gas off first holy [ __ ] take the venison out holy [ __ ] really important not to get too much color I’m the venison it’s a delicate meat very lean and it dries out if it’s
Too dark come on guys Tristan what are you doing they look good they’re burnt no they look good do you think I’m here to [ __ ] massage your ego they’re burnt I won’t come into your world and tell you what to do they’re [ __ ] burnt [ __ ] me Chef could I ask how how much Broccol pepper and tough come on let’s go mashed potato on come here please Tom yes you you I thought you cooked a rack of lamp last week I I did sh but this is venison I don’t want to take these out if they’re not ready I love your [ __ ]
Arage you know that I’ve never met someone a [ __ ] full of [ __ ] in all my life G is answering you back it’s not arrogant back crime Gord you can answer me back we’re in the [ __ ] we got nothing to answer back about no one’s [ __ ] listen you’re all [ __ ] [ __ ] around
Every time I tell you something it’s like [ __ ] bite back bite what I do want is 50 customers served that’s what I want my kitchen my [ __ ] rules uh so far you’re the strongest I need some [ __ ] help right now yeah everyone wants to [ __ ] argue and
[ __ ] piss around all I want is a customer ser that’s nicely cooked let’s go on there like that let’s go it’s oliv all let’s Go time to kill some giant crabs they’re big they’re ugly and they’re coming to get us it’s the invasion of the monster king crab king crab is the largest crustation in the world and they’re heading for Britain Norway has a massive problem with these huge giant king crabs they’re
Just breeding and breeding and breeding reducing the fish stocks and causing a huge problem all the king crab that come to England are frozen so I’m now going to catch one kill one and see what it actually tastes like fresh from the sea two flights and 8 hours later I land
In Kirk andess where I met by local crap Hunter lar Peta oi welcome to Northern Norway thank you very happy to be here never been this far up it’s [ __ ] freezing here there’s only one way to get around in Norwegian lap land and it’s not by car we’re heading over the mountains and
Down to the Frozen Fjord which is where the crabs hang out [Applause] Wooo excellent unbelievable you get like a TR again you know yeah that’s extraordinary this is Anon Anton how are you hello good to see 50,000 crabs live under this ice and if we want to catch one we’re going to have to dive down beneath it did you ever try ice diving I’ve
Never been ice diving I’ve done lots of diving but it’s a special kind of diving and you need uh special skills but uh we will try now don’t make the whole too small I want to get out easy just in case those [ __ ] things are huge will we stay completely dry
Hopefully yeah so I’ve never dived in a drrive suit before H [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] that’s one leg Yeah God I don’t any water get in there is there feel like a big [ __ ] condom at least you’re very safe oh God thought that was hard work though yeah right ice diving can be extremely
Dangerous as it’s so easy to get disorientated in the freezing Dark Water I’m [ __ ] myself when you fetch a crab you should just grab one of the legs the claws are very strong so they can snap your finger and even uh yeah more so if I’m swimming
Over one yeah watch out for my widger it’s going to be cold down there it’ll be frozen I don’t want it snapped off okay [ __ ] me it’s freezing oh [ __ ] my [ __ ] boots we could get hypothermal if we stay down too long so we’ve got to be
Quick but that’s easy said than done I can see the crabs but I can’t see the surface These freakish beasts grow up to 6t wide and have no natural Predators so it’s down to us to bring their Invasion under Control Go God Almighty a lot harder than I thought it would be yeah the size of the thing good size actually and look at her beautiful my balls feel like too big [ __ ] ice Cubes lza showing me how to catch a giant crab now I’m going to show him a new way to eat it but first I got to kill it okay yeah yeah then it’s dead actually now it’s bleeding out y yep we cut off the legs un boil them in sea water for 15
Minutes discarding the body which isn’t that good to eat because the quality of the king crab is so delicious it doesn’t need much more you so I’m just going to do something very very simple with the crem fresh mayonnaise and some Tagan and some lime okay I’m making the sauce by mixing
Equal amounts of mayonnaise and creme fresh with some lime zest salt and pepper roughly chopped Tagan and freshly squeezed lime juice delicious nice lovely you can try to to break the main joint here and if you’re lucky keep it whole the meat will come out like this lovely it’s the size of a
Lobster tail isn’t it now look at that that smells and looks amazing this is what I’ve been waiting For beautiful that’s delicious my God I actually now think I prefer to Lobster so much softer and sweeter is there any more or do I have to go back down and get another one maybe you have to go down again [ __ ] know back again there you go yes one one
Now yes excellent oh dear d right did enjoy the I’m pregnant now curious we quite like the look of Tom Tom yeah we quite like the look of like we played the game if you had to procreate and keep the species going out of the
Four who would it be I can’t wait we went with you again yes Tom right what do you think of the venison I liked it very much texture was fantastic it melted in your mouth really good I quite liked how crispy was on the outside um do you get a chance to watch
Food programs on telly um I do a bit but I I to be honest Too Many Men uh there is the sort of St deia of these world yes there is deia fantastic yeah but let’s hon she does seem a little less steady on her feet nowadays yes
Ready yes message the best b ball supports in the world we need a 12 man here where are you where are you isn’t it absolutely amazing the camera managed to get such a candid ring performance there nothing wrong with that deia is passionate lots of people think deia very controlled
Deia is passionate and she’s passionate about football if a man was passionate about football you going yes that was a definite yeah that’s the reason why I’m sort of concerned about the dealers of this world is the fact we’ve got no one else coming through no that’s right no
Young coming through a new on yeah have a quick look at this a her fabulous hair look at that b yeah fantastic it look and then you add a little tny Port I’m not going to explain to you why now it all be quite clear to you in a moment move that
Candle will you Johnny love this was a ton thank you D you did use pork didn’t you of course one small wine glass full of tny pork that’s all right then she was ahead of the time and she was knowledgeable and she was she was out
There yes I’m going to search high and low to find a talented female that’s good enough to fill the shoes of Fanny credit and then finally get her own slot on on the f-words I need somebody with AAA Fanny Factor unique disciplined tenacious and someone that loves beating
The C out the fanny for this top top Fanny and all we have to do okay is visit the website and um log on get the details and send me a three minute segment of the fanny cred action Fanny videos is that what you’re actually asking people to send
In show me that they can cook talk understand and they’ve got that elus Factor yes okay would you be interested in my funny you could I can’t wait for you to play this person yeah I can’t wait it’s right time yeah okay yeah okay all right go one [Laughter] last that’s the last
One [ __ ] hell oh god oh I just thought the mate was absolutely stunning it was well cooked it was well seasoned and um I’m never going to eat venison again because I don’t think that can be surpassed it took a very long time for it to come to
Be honest I think that would put me off pain it tastes really nice I don’t think the peppers are that sweet and sour but they taste very good okay results of the main course come over Tom please yeah okay Tom how do you think we did 50 Che 50
Okay dining room decided to pay for3 four out of 50 main courses that means 16 refused to pay why um mainly the meat was dry the meat was dry yeah I’d like to think that I stopped all that stuff going out so I think that’s a little bit
Harsh in terms of 16 not agreeing to pay for it Hey listen it’s not perfect but it’s a comeback on the back of the starters yes okay so now desserve 50 out of 50 okay let’s go next on the menu I take on Natasha ginsky in the recipe challenge would you
Prefer top or bottom I’m not going to answer that question and Janet Street Porter sings her teeth into Prince Charles caramelized sugar sugar sugar welcome back to the f word now time for the recipe challenge where I take on a celebrity and beat them at their favorite dish ready yeah recipe
Family Recipe the kinsky carrot cake well this is my father’s recipe and it’s a it’s a kinsky tradition that if you are accepted into the kinsky household you get a carrot cake made for you lovely now when was the last time you made it um I’ve made about nine in the
Last two days you are joking seriously there you are it’s the first for me you know that I don’t believe that no I’m serious trust me this the first time you’ve bited a car first time okay in 11 years I’ve made a car you’ll have beginner’s luck Gord well fingers
Crossed so I’m going to sift my dark brown sugar first yes that makes a nice sort of smooth Center so it’s not too lumpy what are you doing I’m putting my flat all my dry ingredients going in first actually right two taspo of cinnamon you must get a lot of attention
Outside The News Room yes you do get the occasional in fact I’ve got this one chap at the moment who seems to every time he misses the news he sends me a bouet of flowers but I don’t think he realizes that I can’t actually see that
He’s not there yeah just sipped in my brown flour my mixed spice and bicarbon soda fold that in to the oil the eggs and now just going to add the carrot grated the zest of an orange and the zest of a lemon it’s really important to
Keep the carrot fairly wet that gives it a really nice carrot flavor I have mixed all the dry ingredients in one bowl and all the wet ingredients in the other um and then basically you mix both of those together add some carrots nuts raisins dates and then that’s the compl carrot
Cake and now that you’ve invited me very politely into your family yes this is a big initiation for would you mind okay if I just quickly give your father a call okay hello hi it’s Gordon Ramsey I’ve got Natasha in the kitchen here and she’s cooking your amazing carrot cake
Oh yep but have you any tips in I’m lacking confidence dad you’re lacking confidence I think uh crack the whip crack the whip yeah right your dad said move your ass yeah I look forward to joining your family now that I’ve been sort of brought in and sort of given the
Cake sadly there is a bit of bad news if she does lose she’s going to start blaming you you’re aware of that aren’t you I I took that for granted have a nice evening take care thank you byebye okay bye then it does looks a bit green
Doesn’t it does that make you feel better yes it does I’m feeling okay now are you ready for the other yes yes off we go which one do you want top or bottom would you prefer top or bottom I’m not going to answer that question well you’re obviously on the top aren’t
You right it’s a fact good food doesn’t have to be slow food I’m fed up with people eating junk and using the excuse that they’re too busy to cook so every week I’m going to prove how little time you need to create a delicious healthy meal this week’s six rapid response nurses on
A hectic 10hour night shift for them being fast is critical but their diet is seriously slowing them down if we could learn to cook something quick easy something healthy and nutritious his energy right but we would be suponic nurses oh yeah stopping us no stopping us kitchen how long’s that been around I
Mean it’s older than Fanny CR we’ve never used it no we don’t oh my God so freezer’s jam packed yeah yeah we [ __ ] how did you manage how did you get through your day we got a garage got garage micro chips micro junk you’re being too much like women you’re
Caring for everybody by yourselves challenge you go down to the garage yeah right buy one portion of your frozen food yeah come back cook it okay and by the time you’ve cooked it and put on the plate I would have had six por portions of something simple fast delicious with
These two girls doing it okay are you ready yeah you’re going to jump in your car you ready don’t SP am I ready trust me I was born ready the nury spend 25 minutes every night buying [ __ ] food from their local garage I convinced I can teach them to
Cook something much tastier sticky lemon chicken served with champ and green beans we leave the skin on because we going to get some color on the chicken that means color means flavor Time Fresh time potatoes ready time how we doing for time for two ladies that rapid response
Nurses there’s nothing rapid about your cooking would you mind just taking my PA I’ve been in here now 8 minutes and you’re driving around the [ __ ] bend actually it’s bloody impressive is that so it’s not high it’s Good okay where do you think Madam is now you think she’s on the way back cream and milk up to the boil yeah and start stirring there you go Good oh she’s here she’s here Joan Joan Joan sh what is that chili beef and cheese burrito we got to speed up a little bit now Madam’s in the microwave already I don’t want to hear that [ __ ] being little bit of pepper on there I know you can’t keep W on me but
Don’t CL me when I’m cing things out come on I am not going to be beaten by a [ __ ] microwave look on there like that okay right mashed potatoes on there you got to turn it nicely now look when you put on Joanne your beans Jesus Christ right place the beans around the
Outside put the pan down how long please miss microwave 12 12 Sticky Chicken with lemon and green beansy finished B look at that very ni show me show me the evidence on the plate please oh see it’s like you just changed the [ __ ] baby’s [ __ ] Napp yeah I got too much respect for
Your [ __ ] job for you to sit and eat that [ __ ] no chance sorry no chance fast food yeah doesn’t need to be complicated you know that H chicken local supermarket little bit of Honey promise me something yeah we’re going to do this again yeah you got to cook it
Again tell you I’ll help you to cook but I’m not staying through the whole [ __ ] night okay guys let’s go as you leave lift up the Piping Bag right finger in and just put it on top of that little point there yeah that stops the point from bur right time for desserve confider
Rolls with chantilli cream and chocolate SA Sauce perit rolls throw back to the ‘ 80s something that we’ve all forgotten about how to make the perfect shoe pastry first and foremost important turn the oven on 125 M of milk 200 M of water into the pan it’s important that we bring it to the boil slowly butter cast
The sugar salt it stops it from becoming oversweet and gives a really nice sort of rustic flavor to it off the heat 150 g of plain flour vigorously fold that flour in back onto the heat like that look beautiful just hanging off the spoon cool eggs really
Importantly put the eggs in one at a time therefore you get this really nice incorporation of the wi and the yolk look beautiful Piping Bag one nice lump and look just coming through there she is there greas smoth paper stop them from sticking to the TR tray down push
And twist away perfect now finger into a bowl of water and just push down those little pointed BS this stops all from burning into the oven 18 to 20 minutes chocolate sauce we use between sort of 60 and 70% pure kib the better the chocolate the better the sauce simple as
That and the secret now is to melt this chocolate over a pan of Simon water that will melt within 3 to 4 minutes butter honey just look now that’s beautiful smooth and just this wonderful texture there take it off the heat and that yeah it’s perfect milk out Crim chantilli basically a really
Nice flavored cream icing sugar vanilla and then mix it nice Piping Bag push in FID roll generously fill up so you see the cream bouncing back at you and just stick them together lovely icing sugar chocolate sauce into a jug paet rolls with chocolate sauce and Chantell cream
Done come on guys the customers are waiting yes come on and the secret of using fresh V of course it’s a thousand times more exciting than vanilla extract and the flavor is extraordinary yes and Max yes chef you’re a po boy you should always be using
Fresh I use that my cast Sugar after there you good right guys stop pling up two break away plate up Tre back up please let’s go quickly let’s go come on fck fight please yes chocolate me never [Laughter] right a question for for Vi yes while stor French was waiting for her main
Course yes yeah her and her table played shag or die which one do you think won got the horn D definitely got the horn guess who Tom it was me what do you think Lenny would think of that congrats right be afraid the teeth are back and the
Voice fast food I hate it a big M will never pass my lips I’m a food snob there you are I’ve said it now I’ve always Associated salt and sugar with Dreadful common fast food until now when Prince Charles allegedly called for McDonald’s to be banned the Press claimed that his
Very own duy Originals range was even worse than McDonald’s but do people believe it so so if you had a choice between a Big Mac and a duy Originals organic pie which one do you think is the healthist I think this one if I said to you you
Can have a Big Mac or a duchy origin Big Macs never ever okay I’m far too healthy for that I would probably say the pie duy Originals yeah I’m confused and want to find out for myself what duy food is really like I’m going to duchy Super
Siize me and for the next 10 days eat it exclusively from Prince Charles organic range so let’s get the sausages on the go couple of rashes of bacon well chy you like to do instead of tomato sauce oh that is so sweet Al now I’m going to eat this for breakfast every
Day fresh tomato soup with rosemary organic parsley organic sugar what’s sugar doing in soup sugar what’s sugar doing in my corish pasty fresh gravy obviously for the people you don’t cook [ __ ] gravy raw cane sugar caramelized sugar there’s no sugar in my chicken and mushroom pie I can’t eat it I can’t face
It I mean my body is a temple I can’t stomach the thought of another nine days of Ducky Nosh so I’m handing the challenge over to two younger fitter identical twins to make things more interesting I’m putting Lisa on the McDonald’s diet can I have a bacon egg and cheese bagel
Please well Julie is Chu that she gets to choose from the Posh duy range the twins will be attempting the diets for 10 days during which time they’ll be closely monitored by a doctor now I at a pasty and then I discover that there’s more fat saturated fat in
That pasty then there isn’t a big M this does contribute around 90% of the guideline daily amount of saturated fat for an adult woman that’s an incredibly large amount a duches Cornish pasty contains as much saturated fat as four ginster Scotch egg bars or three Rustler’s microwave barbecue rib
Sandwiches or one and a qu Tesco micro Donna kebabs unlike me the twins managed to stick with their menus for 10 days what I want to know is how has the royal regime measured up to McDonald’s it was time to find out what effect it had had on their health well really the
Key thing is the cholesterol now it’s the same sort of news for both of you the percentage of good cholesterol that you’ve got has absolutely dropped like a stone oh really so the ratio of good cholesterol to bad cholesterol is now in the range that would be potentially
Dangerous long term in fact the cholesterol ratio of the twin on the duchy’s diet had changed even more than her sister’s if she continu Ed eating her royal regime it could have had some unexpected side effects loss concentration loss of liido loss of Lao yeah you got nothing to tell us all we
Can say is that in this little experiment that we’ve done with you too it has had a profound effect on your cholesterol yeah right so I [ __ ] up your sex life you can’t remember anything you kept putting your phone in the fridge otherwise okay I’d say all of
That in a nutshell really Janet I do feel bad about it pretty shocking stuff but when I tried to talk to Prince Charles about it he passed it on to duchies who said dues originals are designed to be enjoyed as part of a balanced diet all our products use pure
And natural ingredients with no artificial ingredients or flavors they clearly State the ingredients and nutritional content on the packets we are considering adding nutritional information on our website not good enough Charlie I’ve decided to issue my very own fword asbo to Prince Charles for antisocial food Behavior Prince
Charles this is what you’ve got to do stop adding sugar to your Savory products stop making products with high levels of saturated fat and finally start giving your customers a full nutritional breakdown of all your products I took Charles’s asbo to his mansion on the ma but he didn’t answer
The door there you go Charlie there’s your asbo Hello darling what’s that you’ve got there this is a special pie duy pie how are you fine considering I had to eat that stuff 10 days no I last you one day and you know the reason why I ask you
One day the ducky original DT nothing to do with my loathing of the Mony no nothing to do with the fact I couldn’t give a toss whether I get a night or not unlike you obviously yes thank you I ate that food for one day and I felt unbel
Un believably awful very sweet it’s really sweet why is a pie why pie got sugar in it I make a chicken pie I don’t put sugar in it do you put a sugar in a pasty that was a real [ __ ] body blow I can’t believe you a pasty not very
Janet you know what if he doesn’t do what I’ve asked as both I’m going to go back to Clarence house and I’m going to post his bloody pies through the letter box next on the menu I breed my own lamb I’ve come to Wales for a shag
And I’ll find out who beats who in the recipe challenge yes and the winner is the winner is welcome back to the F workk now here’s the news Natasha you’re about to lose the recipe challenge ready to finish yes yes s it up I’d love to know
What you do with your icing cuz I’ve always struggled I used Philadelphia at some stage exctly what I’ve used nothing wrong with it whatsoever okay I’ve gone for a masap pony one this time round so I don’t know whether or not that’s going to work all right a piping hot pallet
Knife just just gets a really nice thin icing and inside the icing we’ve got full fat cream cheese little bit of melted butter and some fresh vanilla seeds oh God Madam yes what no honestly it’s fine it’s all in the taste all right what all I can
Say is I’m tried that’s all you tried very well now okay should we slice a portion yeah going to knock it off your knife JV gently gently gently gently gently number one this number two it taste the uh the cinnamon that one Christmasy yeah it’s quite heavy as
Well I think let’s try the next one taste citrus fruits in that like a lemon icing or something isn’t it completely different taste though isn’t it it’s like it’s quite syrupy as well isn’t it okay deliver the news yes the good news good new what do
They say we don’t need to know um they love it you know what this time there’s a clear winner right JB come on and the winner is the winner is come yes get in there well done my D congratulations really good to see you thank you so much for coming on
Now now one more thing don’t tell me that please [ __ ] up out my kitchen now here’s a recipe for baby lamb one milal Yes last year brought up two Pig triny and Susanna and they made damn fine eating this year I’m taking Homestead farming to a new level I’m going to breed my very own lamb I’ve come to Wales home of the best lamb in the world just 3 million people and 9 million
Sheep no wonder they’re known as a nation of sheep lovers house STS welcome to Wales big day today I’ve come to Wales for a sh pissy there I’m visiting an award-winning farmer whose family have been rearing sheep for Generations mate hello G how are you you
Well yeah very well thanks good to see you may has exactly what I need to crossbreed my F-word Lambs loads of beautiful Welsh Mountain ‘s he also has a selection of pedigree French charet Rams these are ideal as it’s a big breed and will give my Lambs extra bulk so
These are these are thorough breads I mean these are unique these are yeah yeah French French bread yes Christ they do look French so what were we looking for in terms of I mean obviously a big pair of bollocks yeah you need a bit of strength really yeah he looks quite oldy
Oldy Stern yes he’s he’s foury old he’s he’s had plenty of experience that one are they friendly oh they’re fairly friendly well they’re French is that normal for the bollocks to drag down like that that big that big yes it is yeah we’ll have to check one really to
See if if he check his BS yeah to see if it’s fit to work what do you mean well you can feel they got to be the same size really balls yes yes I’ll let you this is where you come in I’m not going to start jumping on their bollocks and
Fing their bollocks sorry now I’m going to [ __ ] draw the line [ __ ] hell they’re massive absolutely massive Jesus Christ yeah they’re they’re hot the balls are I mean they’re like piping hot yeah he must be ready for work then [ __ ] hell so this is called John Baptist I’ve
Named him John Baptist time to get your rocks off my man yeah John Baptist is going in with May’s Welsh Mountain use these are one of the finest breeds in the world and produce meat with a phenomenal amount of flavor come on John Baptist why is he
Doing that with his teeth he’s showing off a bit he is showing his presence typical John Baptist always [ __ ] flaunting it and for him to lick it like that is that normal yeah come on John upti Ali get those balls swinging come on there he Goes there he goes quick so quick man yeah it is quick yeah and he could sort of you know ejaculate in that short period of time yes yes yeah oh he’s having a second Chance John Baptist [ __ ] French what is it with him Jean Baptist will Shag in left right and Center I branded the first two YY covered in 5 months they’ll give birth to my very own fword Lambs that will come home and live with me in London bringing these two breeds you
Know together it’s going to be a quite an interesting Journey from a chess point of view in terms of you know looking at them both individually having tasted them individually and now combining them um is going to be fascinating is that absolutely orgasmic it’s not any ordinary profal is it no
It’s kind of an extraordinary profal right guys come please yes right starters yes yeah 25 out of 50 yeah [ __ ] St yeah main cour 34 better up you pulled it back 34 out of 50 now good dessert well you did [ __ ] well9 46 out of 50 [Applause] customers listen who are those four
Listen listen guys that means the grand total of 100 105 out of 150 yes what scares me about that is the thought of you for cooking at yeah at Well Done Right do me a favor get the [ __ ] out of my kitchen out go check your share
Prices on the menu next week the Lambs come to London and my flock is in for a shock otherwise I didn’t get what I didn’t Jan Porter’s mouth gets her into trouble the police have said that offering false meat is a highly provocative act and
Girls allowed come to dine will I be the reason they finally split I’m a vegetarian did you not get the message vegetarians aren’t welcome if you think you’ve got what it takes to become the next big female TV cook then send me a video see you next week don’t be late for your Table [Applause] [Applause] that’s better that you sure yeah yeah happy yeah you look great yeah absolutely great he one last